Dec. 2nd we celebrated Aspen's 1st birthday. It's so hard to believe she is already a year! It seems like yesterday we were driving home with this 6 week old peanut with terrified looks on our faces. We had no clue what we were doing or how to properly take care of a puppy. A year later we still have no clue what we're doing but she's potty trained and hasn't eaten the couch, success! This dog is our child and before you tell me animals and children are different, don't. I'm aware. But for me there are very few differences between furry babies and human babies. Obviously the love for a child exceeds the love of a pet and there are things you'd do for your human child that you wouldn't do for your furry child but if you aren't willing to have a huge love for your pet, treat them like family, and make them apart of your life vs. an accessory in your life then don't get one. Personally I don't think animals deserve to be an accessory, they have too much love to give. Now that my rant is over I can get back to my point, this dog is our child. We've watched her grow up, learn new things, and stuck by her during a very rough first year of life.
As some of you know this year with her has been more than difficult, here's a quick recap: early on she was throwing up much more than a normal pup should, after months of trying to figure out what's wrong she ended up in the hospital with the vet telling us her digestive organs weren't moving and if it gets any worse she might die. The theory was she had Inflammatory Bowel Disease and after months of food trials we discovered it was only a food sensitivity, praise God! Now she is on a food that is easier on her tummy and life is peachy on that end. However, from a young age we also noticed her behavior was different than most puppies. She wouldn't nap like a normal pup during the day, she didn't want to play with her toys and only wanted to bite us. As she got older the behavior progressed and we had no clue what was happening. She was great in obedience class, understood commands and tricks, and surpassed her classmates on comprehension. But at home things were different, she was becoming aggressive and seemed to never calm down. We didn't understand why this was happening because she got plenty of exercise and stimulation that this breed requires. I talked to her vet and she said it wasn't an obedience issue it was a behavior issue. She referred me to a vet that has a PhD is animal behavior. We met with her and she diagnosed Aspen with severe anxiety (I had no clue dogs could have anxiety! What could they be anxious about??). This threw us both for a loop and I immediately blamed myself. Clearly I did something wrong and the stress of getting married, moving to Ohio, and keeping a puppy alive rubbed off on Aspen and I ruined her. The vet assured me that it wasn't me and most of the time dogs develop anxiety on their own (I still didn't feel better and to this day blame myself). After observation the vet explained to us that Aspen does not know how to calm down. She is almost always in an anxious state and cannot regulate the excitement. It's very similar to humans with anxiety and do not know how to control it. She recommended anti-anxiety medication and we are now on the road to recovery. We meet with the vet monthly to discuss her progress and options to get Aspen to a balanced state. She isn't there yet but she will actually take naps during the day and the biting has dropped tremendously. WOOHOO! So that is where we are today and we are eager to get our baby to a balanced and happy state. Can you imagine what it would be like to not be able to calm down and not have control over it?? Poor thing!
At one of our vet visits I was raving about how sweet Aspen is, how funny, entertaining, and loving she can be. Both of us were going on and on about how much we love her and even though we can't wait for her to be balanced and calm down she is an awesome dog. Our vet had no response. She couldn't understand how we could feel that way about her. Even though she is a great vet and very knowledgeable I was stunned a woman that has devoted her life to helping animals could not accept my dog for who she is, sickness and all. We told her even after everything we have gone through we would choose her all over again. She said we were crazy. Why could she not open her mind to see how it's possible to love her? Shouldn't she of all people understand? I began to wonder if she was right. Is Aspen really that bad? My heart has been in a lot of turmoil because of it all. I play the blame game, ask God why she couldn't just be a regular dog, feel so distraught that she feels anxious and I can't fix it, and at the same time feel such happiness because of the joy and fun she brings to our lives. When all of this was too overwhelming my dad was such an encouragement when he said, "Honey, God brought this dog to you because he knew how loving and compassionate you both are. Most would throw that dog away the minute something was wrong but He knew you would stick by her. Plus remember, no dog is perfect." Ever since those words of wisdom I thank God for her and her craziness everyday. I feel honored God allowed us to take care of one of His fragile creatures.
Aspen has taught me a lot since she's come into our lives. She's shown that patience really is a virtue, love does not require perfection, and the little things in life are sometimes the most exciting. I love her so much! I'd have 100 more of her.....maybe I am crazy.
~Maddie
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